Wise Words

"Wait on the Lord, be strong and of good courage, and He shall strengthen your heart...wait on the Lord. Psalms 27:14


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Friday, December 29, 2006

Reflections of the past year...

So, last year around this time I had a post on my resolutions and what they were going to be. Let's just check over them and see what happened:

I, Nicole Boedeker, resolve to:

1. Laugh more
I think I did more crying than laughing. It's been a tough year.
2. Worry less Nope, I got divorced, have had no child support coming in for several months, my ex got his little mistress pregnant, most likely before he was even served papers and had their kid a few days before Em's birthday and we have been just going round and round with the whole thing about Em and child support since then. I'm paying her tuition all by myself along with the regular bills and it's not easy, but I do it to give her a better life and education than what she would get in a public school and I do it willingly. I can now disclose this as it is public knowledge - we lost the re-bid of our major contract at work that we were going after to keep so the work situation is shakey since they really don't need 3 admins and I have the least tenure there. Yeah, worry abounds but I'm hoping that 2007 will be a better year.
3. Trust God with everything instead of trying to fix it myself. Well, I have learned to wait on God more than go full speed ahead on my own - but I still have problems sometimes on being impatient and not understanding God's timing.
4. Read my Bible more and spend more time with God Ok, so I kind of tanked on the reading the Bible more part, but I have spent more time with God, talking to Him, unloading on Him, thanking Him for the things in my life and that I experience that are God's miracles to me - like a gorgeous sunset or gold fog in the morning or an easy traffic day...the simple things from God are what I am taking more notice of.
5. Look to the future instead of dwell on the past Ummmm, I plead the 5th on this one.
6. Do more stuff outside the home for me whether it's lunch with a friend or a movie by myself or take a drive in the hills around Austin on a warm day, windows open, music on - just me and God and nobody else(if you don't take care of yourself, how can you take care of those who depend on you, like a precious little 4 year old) Yes, I did more of this. Traveled to Missouri with a Em to meet friends from across the US. MC has been a HUGE factor in trying to break me out of my homebody, reclusive shell. In fact, we are going to go out for NYE - first time I've been out in at least 4 years for NYE.
7. Lose 20 pounds (or more) through #8 and additional exercise. I lost about 20 and during the Trail of Lights I walked on average about 6-10 miles a night and I am going to start a fitness regemine of weight lifting and walking/jogging this coming year - in fact I already signed up for it and paid for it today.
8. Get out to dance again - I used to teach C&W dance and was really good at it and I loved it! In fact, I lost 40 pounds in the first year teaching it b/c it was so intense. Was down to a size 5/6. I won't see that size again, but a nice size 10 would't be so bad. Not as much as I would have liked. MC and I have gone out a few times dancing, but unless a guy friend dances with me, I don't usually get asked to country dance anymore. Bummer - I vow to change that this year too.
9. Do more things with Emily that are what she wants to do, not so much what I want us to do I've been working on this but admittedly still have a little ways to go, but it has gotten much better.
10. Take a trip to somewhere, anywhere, that isn't writing, family reunion or work related Well, I went to Missouri with Em on a trip that I coordinated and facilitated and this coming year I am going to be in charge of these trips all across the US for my friends Jack and his wife Gayle. I will be going to a few of them too. At least 2 in Missouri/Kansas and 2 in Texas.
11. Take that full day at a spa that I talked about in the last post. I'd love to get an exfoliation scrub, wrap, facial, reflexology foot massage, head massage and an aromatherapy deep tissue massage. Of course that will be about 525.00-600.00 for all of that (tip included). SHAH! Don't have the money for that but it's nice to aspire to for this coming year. Um, yeah with what money? Maybe this year.
12. Give over ALL my anger, hurt, loneliness and disappointment to God and let Him deal with it instead of giving it to Him in parts. He can take care of it better than I can. Oh, that is so hard to do. It's hard to give it all over and not still feel it at times and have it come flooding back. Still working on this one.

So, as you can see, it has not been a total success, but that is what life is about. Striving to do better, do more, live more, be better all around. I'll post my 2007 resolutions Sunday and some of them might surprise you - I'm sure that when I really think of them that some of them might surprise me too.

BTW, what are your resolutions?


greatwhitebear said...

uh, once again, i resolve to have no resolutions!

Jean-Luc Picard said...

Worthwhile thoughts, Nic.

If I have a resolution, it's to think before saying something to someone at the office. It has landed me in trouble before!

Laurel Wreath said...

Nic you are on the right path. I am with you on the exercise bit, I just need to go sign up.

God is going to use your pain from this last year, I promise you. You are going to be able to reach out to people you would not have been able to before.

I know how difficult it is to turn everything over to God.

Happy New year and many blessings in the New Year.

Uisce said...

here's to an excellent 2007... happy new year!!

Carmi said...

I make daily resolutions instead of annual ones - I'm really bad a forward-planning, and 24 hours is about all I can handle :)

My answer, then, is about to go up on my blog in a new post.

Loved your reflections here. You've grown tremendously in a brief amount of time. I hope that 2007 brings you continued growth and happiness, both of which you deserve immensely.

It's been great sharing words with you, my friend. Looking forward to more of the same in '07.dlopy

Kari Z. Murphy said...

You've inspired me. Yours isn't the first post I've seen about someone sharing resolutions, but it is the first where you were oh-so-honest about last years...

You have really encouraged me to make some for 2007...I guess I had better get busy. Maybe I will even be brave enough to post them!

In Christ alone,
at healedwaters.com

Erna said...

We all have to keep pressing on, don't we. There are many days I feel like I'm taking 2 steps forward and 3 steps back in some areas. I appreciated your honesty in regard to where you've been and where you've come. I thank the Lord for each new opportunity to try again when I fall back.

I enjoyed reading about how you are delighting more in the things you see such as, "a gorgeous sunset or gold fog in the morning or an easy traffic day...the simple things from God are what I am taking more notice of."