Wise Words

"Wait on the Lord, be strong and of good courage, and He shall strengthen your heart...wait on the Lord. Psalms 27:14

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Thursday, February 02, 2006

Church Sign Wisdom - Part Three

Yet more wisdom from the signs:

251. Daily prayer will diminish your cares
252. Do you want to go to heaven? Flight instructions given here!
253. Sit In Demonstration This Sunday at 11:00AM
254. May your teenage head banger meet The Ageless Heart Knocker
255. Men will die, this is sure, sin the cause, Christ the cure
256. If you don't have anything to pray about, thank God you don't
257. When you don't witness, you just did
258. We always find time for the things we value most
259. If you can't stand the heat – better make plans to avoid it
260. The perfect church – for those who aren't
261. Salvation is free but not until you ask for it
262. God answers prayer not advice
263. Our strength is seen in the things we stand for
264. The wages of sin is death – quit before payday!
265. Decisions can take you out of God's will but not out of His reach
266. Expect great things from God! Attempt great things for God!
267. No force is greater than the power of God!
268. Christians are like coals of a fire. Together they glow, apart they grow cold.
269. For every sin the devil has an excuse
270. I asked Jesus, “how much do you love me?” He stretched His arms wide, said “This much”...and died.
271. God's last name is not "Damn"
272. As long as there are tests, there will be prayer in school
273. We're called to stand out! Not blend in!
274. Is your life running on empty? Free fillups here every Sunday!
275. Children brought up in church are seldom brought up in court
276. On the race track of life make pit stops: Pray, Inspire, Touch
277. Get out of WordPerfect and get into God's perfect Word
278. A cloudy day is no match for a sunny disposition!
279. Jesus is changing the world one life at a time
280. Too many people clamor for the freedom to do what should not be done
281. WWJD = Walking With Jesus Daily
282. In order to understand GOD, we must stand under GOD
283. GOD gives and forgives; men get and forget
284. Who wants to be a Christianaire?
285. The cross is God's compass pointing to heaven
286. You are not too bad to come in, you are not too good to stay out!
287. Love sees through a telescope, not a microscope
288. In trying times don't quit trying!
289. Profanity is the linguistic crutch of the inarticulate
290. There is no right way to do a wrong thing
291. You love Jesus only as much as you the person you love the least
292. If you take care of your character, your reputation will take care of itself
293. He who is good at making excuses is seldom good for anything else
294. Be careful of your life lest a child stumble over it
295. Every home is a school. What do you teach?
296. Having a sharp tongue may cut your own throat
297. Truth is! Lies have to be invented
298. The tongue weighs practically nothing, but few people can hold it
299. Anger is only one letter away from danger
300. The cross is God's way of making a plus sign out of a minus
301. The vitamin good for friendship is "B1"
302. I’m a fool for God. Whose “fool” are you?
303. A radical is someone with both feet planted firmly in the air
304. Be thankful for stumbles for they prevent falls
305. What part of 'THOU SHALT NOT' don't you understand?
306. Choices have consequences
307. Now, even Darwin believes!!
308. Pick your friends, but not to pieces
309. When the trumpet sounds we’re outta here!
310. You say there is no absolute truth? Are you absolutely sure?
311. As long as you can "take Him or leave Him"; leave Him because He will not be taken half heartedly
312. Want to make God laugh? Just tell him your plans
313. When you harbor bitterness, happiness will dock elsewhere
314. If someone says something untrue about you, you must live life so that no one will believe it
315. God made His people for worship not for wickedness!
316. We're called to be now what we will be when Jesus returns
317. April 1: National Atheists Day
318. The Devil has a "plot" but God has a "plan"
319. It does not matter what happens to us but what happens in us
320. For the road to heaven, turn right and go straight
321. Apply yourself to the Bible and the Bible to yourself
322. Many books can inform, but only the Bible can transform
323. T G I F - Today God Is First
324. On judgment day you'll meet Father God not Mother Earth!
325. Founded on the Word-- Focused on the world!
326. Prayer should be our first resource not our last resort!
327. If you teach school children that they came from animals don't be surprised when they act like it
328. Forgive your enemies nothing annoys them more
329. When life needs rebooting – remember – Jesus saves!
330. Souls/programs: Both must be saved and debugged by their Maker!
331. Live life so that the preacher won't have to lie at the funeral
332. Will you be one of the grateful dead, or one of the regretful dead?
333. Jesus paid a bill He didn't owe
334. Are you lost? Come on in for directions!
335. Aren't you glad your mother didn't believe in abortion?
336. I have a Friend in high places
337. Everyone wants to go to heaven but no one wants to die
338. God's work, done in God's way, will never lack for God's supplies
339. Same owner for 2000 years
340. When you are the zero, He is the One
341. All Christians have the same boss
342. The church is a hospital for sinners, not a rest home for saints
343. If you find yourself with time on your hands put 'em together and pray
344. Get down on your knees and fight like a man!
345. Ask about our pray-as-you-go plan
346. To put your fears to rest, put your faith in Jesus
347. We don't have a prayer without God
348. Join us on your way to eternity
349. Only God is in a position to look down on anyone
350. Is your home on the rocks, or on the Rock?
351. Willpower: you give God your will, He gives you the power
352. At the heart of sin is the letter "I"
353. There is no reward from God, to those who seek it from men
354. Jesus is the rock that doesn't roll
355. Redemption Center – No coupon needed
356. Home improvement: take your family to church
357. Get on-line with God: Unlimited access, no busy signals, 24/7 tech support
358. Never run faster than your guardian angel can fly!
359. Make your church grow: Some Assembly Required
360. Turn or burn
361. Church: Come to worship, leave to serve
362. Father knows best
363. If your hope is not in Jesus, you are hopeless!
364. Sign broken. Message inside.
365. Only a living Savior can rescue a dying world
366. God says "Don't wait ", Satan says "Procrastinate"
367. God loves us not because of who we are but because of who He is
368. What man creates feeds our desires. What God creates feeds our needs.
369. Need a Lifeline? Talk to God!
370. Give your burden to the Weightlifter from Calvary!
371. Get rich QUICK! Count your blessings.
372. Heavenly Forecast: Reign forever!
373. Jesus died for you so live for him
374. Ever been between a rock and a hard place? Then thank the Lord, because it's good to be next to the Rock when you are in a hard place
375. It's very difficult to be religious, but so simple to be a Christian

2 comments:

Jean-Luc Picard said...

There's a lot of wisdom there, Nic.

RC said...

Do you think putting a witty phrase on a sign does anyone any good...does this encourage us to live our lives differently...or do they just make Christian laught and turn non-believers away from experiencing authentic relationships and truth from people?

--RC of strangeculture.blogspot.com