So it's been a while since I've done one of these, but I really have something on my mind.
How does one deal with someone who inexplicably treats them like they're a non-entity? Especially when this person is selective as far as who they "deign" to treat like gold – in front of those they have chosen to give the brush off to?
To me it reeks of manipulation and I do not tolerate that kind of treatment! For me and my daughter to be treated like we're nuisances to someone and can't even be bothered with, but yet Nate and Oscar and others in the same group are treated like they're on pedestals and fawned over...tsk, tsk, tsk.
I do understand that this person is going through a rough time. But, let me caveat this: I. Don't. Care. what goes on in a person's life, there are no excuses to be made for that kind of hurtful, awful attitude towards others. I can sympathize and I feel for them, but for them to select WHO they are going to treat with courtesy and decency in a small gathering and do so in front of those they choose to pretty much give a cold shoulder to is very rude. And then to try and circumvent rules and behavioral guidelines that have been placed in OUR household and to do so in front of me with pointed intention... Oh, no ma'am! For shame!
I have always been taught that you CHOOSE your attitude. You don't let it choose you and for heaven's sake you DON'T play selective favorites and shun others in the same group. It's common courtesy and just plain within the bounds of decency.
IDK why this has upset me so, other than it's egregious and horribly manipulative behavior to not only me but my daughter as well who is the sweetest, most tender hearted child you will ever meet who has a real heart for God and feels things very deeply, though she will hold them in if she's hurt. I love the person who is acting this way and they'll be in my prayers for an attitude adjustment, but if it happens again, I cannot keep my mouth shut about it, but I need to know how to do it the right way!
Either tell me the problem you have with me and my daughter (or are you treating my daughter that way as an extension of the unknown or imaginary "issue" you have with me) or put your big kid britches on and get over it! No excuses!
This hasn't happened to just me either, but also from time to time to someone else that I hold very near and dear to my heart. It's just plain WRONG! It's no better than a slap in the face and there's no reason behind it, but then people make excuses for the behavior, which allows it to continue, and I don't understand WHY! I abhor manipulation in any form so even though I love this person, it leaves a very bad taste in my mouth and I don't want to have that in any form toward this person, which is why this is so difficult for me to feel this way about them!
So, my lovely, Godly blogfriends. I'd like to know how you would handle it b/c the next time it happens I'm afraid my words might not be seasoned with much Grace. I don't want to cause a rift, but I am not going to allow myself and especially my daughter to continue to be treated this way!
Now that I've gotten that out of my system, I have to say that I love going to see Oscar's family in Midland. I'm just very, very sorry we didn't get to see his dad and step-mom this time b/c they are just such wonderful people who are so full of life and laughter!
We had a blast up there for the 4th and my birthday though at his mom and step-dad's. I do not feel 37 at all! I love the peaceful feel there. His mom always has such huge enveloping hugs that make you feel warm and fuzzy and his step-dad is just the sweetest, most unassuming guy there is and seems genuinely surprised when he's thanked for something or told that something he's done is appreciated.
I love being a part of their family and I love that they are part of mine! Just being with them is a blessing and a gift enough.
Emily is up there this week to do golf camp and swimming. First time other than with my mom or her dad that she will have been away from me for such a "long" time. I hope she really enjoys it. I think she would do great if she gives it a chance. I'm not a fan of golf, but, hey, I'm great at driving the cart and doing QA for the drinks. LOL!
Hope everyone had a great 4th of July! I'm looking forward to hearing your advice on the above matter. I really could use it.
1 comment:
Good thoughts, Nic. Emily has a good defence in you. She shouldn't be subjected to anything otherwise they answer to you, plain and simple.
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