Is it merely about the passing on of eyes and chins and hair color?
Or is it, rather, the replication of the heart?
Do we leave a bigger mark by passing on our genes, or our thoughts?"
~ Shannon Woodward, author of
Inconceivable: Finding Peace
in the Midst of Infertility ~
Would I rather pass on my looks or my values? That is essentially what this quote is asking. To me there is no question of which one I would choose. I would rather pass on my values, my character, my morals than my looks.
Somewhere in the past, my daughter got it into her head that she was pretty and started saying so at the tender age of 2 and even now, almost 3 years later, there is not a mirror that she doesn’t pause a moment in front of and take a look into. She is undoubtedly gorgeous, of that there is no question, so I'm sure it came from these past few years of people saying in front of her how beautiful she is. That is when I started telling her this:
“Sweetheart, it is more important to be pretty on the inside than pretty on the outside. It is better to be kind, generous and compassionate to others than it is to look good. There are people who can be beautiful on the outside who are plain ugly on the inside because of how they treat and act toward others. Then there are people who may not be so pretty on the outside but they are beautiful on the inside and they always have friends because they treat others with kindness, gentleness, honesty and compassion. Which person would you rather be friends with?”
Now I ask that question to you. What kind of person would you rather your child be? Would you rather your child be physically beautiful but spiritually ugly or would you rather your child be plain looking but spiritually beautiful, obeying God and following His commands?
Children have to be taught how to hate, to hurt others deliberately, to reject others based on a variety of factors. It is interesting to note that they don’t have to be taught to love, to accept others as they are, to play with other children regardless of looks, handicap, color, race or religion.
The legacy you leave in your children doesn’t hinge on biological connections. Adopted, foster, step or biological, you have the chance to pass on a legacy of true Godly beauty in the children of your heart. In adverse times will they curse and bemoan their fate or will they look to God, their Helper and Strength and press forward, making the best of their situation? In happy, joyous, prosperous and successful times will they pat their own back or will they give praise to the One who gave them that “Good” in the first place? In times of sorrow and sadness, will they turn to amoral pursuits or will they cling to the Rock to fill the emptiness inside? When they see others suffering and hurting will they pass on by, saying that it is someone else’s problem to deal with or will they lend a helping hand and be the example of love and compassion that our Savior showed to all?
Matthew 25:31-46 says:
"When the Son of Man comes in his glory, and all the angels with him, he will sit on his throne in heavenly glory. All the nations will be gathered before him, and he will separate the people one from another as a shepherd separates the sheep from the goats. He will put the sheep on his right and the goats on his left.
"Then the King will say to those on his right, 'Come, you who are blessed by my Father; take your inheritance, the kingdom prepared for you since the creation of the world. For I was hungry and you gave me something to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink, I was a stranger and you invited me in, I needed clothes and you clothed me, I was sick and you looked after me, I was in prison and you came to visit me.'
"Then the righteous will answer him, 'Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you something to drink? When did we see you a stranger and invite you in, or needing clothes and clothe you? When did we see you sick or in prison and go to visit you?'
"The King will reply, 'I tell you the truth, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers of mine, you did for me.'
"Then he will say to those on his left, 'Depart from me, you who are cursed, into the eternal fire prepared for the devil and his angels. For I was hungry and you gave me nothing to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me nothing to drink, I was a stranger and you did not invite me in, I needed clothes and you did not clothe me, I was sick and in prison and you did not look after me.'
"They also will answer, 'Lord, when did we see you hungry or thirsty or a stranger or needing clothes or sick or in prison, and did not help you?'
"He will reply, 'I tell you the truth, whatever you did not do for one of the least of these, you did not do for me.'
"Then they will go away to eternal punishment, but the righteous to eternal life."
The Golden Rule says “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you” but there are many “pretty” people out there today who have twisted that to say “Do unto others BEFORE they do unto you” and act accordingly. Which Golden Rule would you rather your children follow?
Character is a value that you can pass down to any child in your sphere of influence and what better way than to start at home? Biological connection has no bearing on this, but your heart, your Christian walk, your own personal character and integrity do.
Proverbs 31:30 says “Charm is deceitful and beauty is vain, but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.”
Children become the example that they see and are given. Be the example you want the child of your heart to become.
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For those of you who have been following the progress on my Dan's injuries in Iraq (you can read them in the posts below this one) I have some very sad news:
I have been informed of the terribly sad news that Staff Sgt. Jeff Hansen, the soldier that was submerged for over 8 minutes in the canal and was in a coma, has died from his injuries. Dan very easily could have been in Staff Sgt. Hansen's place if he had not been the first one pulled out.
Please say a prayer tonight for Staff Sgt. Hansen's family. He leaves behind a wife and his father who were both able to be there with other family members when he died. He was 31, the same age as Dan and was Dan's Staff Sergeant and I know that Dan thought very highly of him. Dan is continuing to recover in Germany and they will know on Thursday if he is going back to Iraq right away or if he will require some further treatment as he is still having some difficulty breathing at times and still coughing up clots from his lungs. Walcott is currently at Walter Reed hospital and expected to make a full recovery. Thank you again for your continued prayers for Dan and Pfc. Corey Walcott and for the 167th B Troop platoon and Staff Sgt. Hansen's family as they deal with the loss of a beloved family member and friend.
Nicole
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8 comments:
Be the example you want the child of your heart to become.
That is so true, and how I struggle with my selfishness and getting over my issues to show my children what I really want to show them, kwim?
I'll be praying for Dan & the troop around him!
OMG, that's terrible news about SSgt Hansen... just unbelievably sad. This is all such a tragic waste of America's bravest men and women. I'm glad to hear that Dan is better. I hope that he and all of his fellow troops will soon be back home where they belong.
That is so true. Just because someone looks nice does not mean that they are and vice versa. I hope I am doing an adequate job of instilling that concept in my children. Thanks for the wonderful post!
This is a beautiful post. I agree, we can be examples to any child, even if we don't have our own. I talked about this today on my post about this quote! Check it out here
Oh, and I'm praying for this family who has lost a loved one and for your husband as well!
Please pass along my condolences to Dan and SSGT. Hansen's family.
You are setting a great example for Em.
Though your child is pretty, I'm sure she has the values and morals from you that so many admire.
I'm really sorry to hear about SSgt Hansen; it's a terrible tragedy.
Beautiful post - we had some of hte same thoughts. Thanks for sharing.
My thoughts and prayers will be with the Hansen family - and yours.
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