Championship Mindset

I feel very strongly that this message is for someone, or maybe many someones out there today. This comes from a YouTube video from the phenomenal Trent Shelton, but I have transferred from video to text because many people pay better attention when it comes to the written word, whereas video can kind of go in one ear and out the other. If this is for you, know that I am praying for you, even though I don't know who you are. Keep moving forward! Be a Champion. Have a Championship Mindset.

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KMFLY - Keep Moving Forward and let nothing hold you back! Today is special. Today is that day that you become that new you. Today is the day that you become that Champion! It's time for you to stop feeling so sorry for yourselves and doing nothing about it. It's time to stop doing the same old things that have gotten you NOWHERE! It's time to stop using excuses to keep you at a place where you know you shouldn't be. Each and every one of you [watching this] is great. Each and every one of you [watching this] is a Champion. But YOU gotta make that decision.

There are 5 truths to every Champion, whether it be Michael Jordan, Bill Gates, Oprah Winfrey...people who are Champions in their field, in their profession. There are 5 truths that each and every one of these people have. And today we're going to talk about it. You are going to develop that Championship Mindset. It's time for you to be great.

1. Commitment. The first TRUTH to every Champion is that every Champion has something called commitment. Staying loyal to what you said you were going to do...LONG after the mood you said it in has left. So that means that, for a whole month, if you said you were going to wake up at 5 AM to run 3 miles - that sound great the first week. Excited. What happens when that 3rd week comes around? When it's no longer fun. When it's no longer exciting. When that mood you said it in has left. Are you still going to be committed to it? Is it still going to mean that much to you? So many people live a life of incomplete dreams because they give up, they throw in the towel when that mood has left.

2. Discipline. The second TRUTH to every Champion is that every Champion has a little something called discipline. Tattoo it. That mean's permanent. Tattoo your purpose on your heart. So that your actions are trainable before you. Every Champion gets good at saying "NO" to the things that don't get them the "YES". Right? If it's not helping them, it's hurting them. But a lot of us lack that discipline. We say that our dreams are so important. Our goals are so important. We're so focused. But that first opportunity comes whether it's to to go to the club or do something that doesn't move you closer to your dreams, you go jump on it and do it. Your circle is filled with people who don't share your vision. That's holding you back and not moving you forward. You got to be disciplined! Success is a lonely road. There's not going to be too many people around you. You're not going to have a whole clique of friends because they're not going to be disciplined like you. They're not going to understand the commitment that it takes to make these dreams, to make these things happen. You gotta be disciplined.

3. Consistency. The third TRUTH to every Champion is that every Champion is consistent. We anchor our actions in greatness. So daily, not every now and then, not when we feel like it, so daily we produce nothing less than our very best. You know, when you're consistent, you're reliable. When you're reliable, you become trustworthy. There's nothing better in this world than a trustworthy person because when you're trustworthy, you're dependable.

4. Faith. The fourth TRUTH to every Champion is that every Champion has faith. Belief in the odds are beautiful, even when the odds say it's impossible. You know, there's a guy called David and he fought that impossible Goliath. Well, with us, we have a lot of Goliaths in our lives. Whether it be people doubting us. Whether it be statistics. Whether it be our generational curses. Whether it be genetics. Whether it be where we're from, our environment. But we have to "David" ALL of those things because God tells us that faith will make us well. Faith is what makes dreams come true. Believe it. You gotta throw that blanket over that scoreboard of life. You gotta to keep playing until your final seconds are up. You gotta give it your all. You gotta KNOW where you're going. Not what you're going to do. Not believe in the circumstances. Not believe in the stress. Not believe in the challenges. Not believe in the obstacles. You gotta believe in your finish line, that you're going to get there NO MATTER WHAT. That's what Champions believe in. Faith.

5. Heart. The fifth final TRUTH to every Champion is that every Champion has heart. Finding the strength to keep going, even when your mind, people, whatever, says you have nothing left. You keep pushing through those tears. You keep pushing through that pain. You keep pushing through that struggle. You keep pushing through that hurt. Because your heart won't let you quit. Your heart won't let you find excuses. Your heart makes you go until you reach that finish line in life. That's what you gotta have pumping in your heart. It's not about talent. It's not about money. It's about the person who just wants it the most. You gotta want it. You gotta want it so bad that it's hard for you to sleep at night. You gotta want it so bad that it wakes you up in the morning. You gotta want it so bad that conditions outside won't stop you, that people around you won't stop you. Even if it's just you by yourself. That's how bad you gotta want it. It's gotta be planted in your heart. When you talk about it, it should be hard for you to talk about your vision and your goals and your dreams because it means that much to you. Every Champion has heart.

I want you to look in your mirror tonight and create this new you. I want you to develop this Championship Mindset because God has great things for you. God has planned a future of greatness for you. Only thing you have to do is BELIEVE IT and follow His ordered steps. It's time to be Champions. Remember, it all starts with you. Championship Mindset...

Little Eyes Are Watching You

Parents, what are you teaching your children? 

I mean seriously.

• "Too lazy to work" is NOT acceptable for the description under "worked at". They will look for the easy way and expect to get the success without the effort. That is so far from reality it's laughable.
• Skimpy clothing/bathing suits on children is the playground for pedophile's minds - and it's almost always someone that the child knows, adult or their peer, who molests them - trust me on this, I know this from personal experience. 
• Dropping the "F" bomb every other word will get more doors shut in their faces for GOOD opportunities than almost anything else. It's so unattractive and, regardless of their intelligence level, shows that they are anything but. 
• Disrespecting those in authority, your elders, those who are different than you, yourself...your spouse...will teach them to put themselves first instead of looking out for others, could land them in hot water with law enforcement, have them in and out of relationships and marriages because they expect to always be right and heaven help anyone who disagrees with them so POOF...divorce makes it "easy", and they will have the same issues with each relationship. So many parents talk to their children with disrespect. You are not dealing with an inconvenience, you are raising a human being who needs your love, your protection and your respect.

There are so many more but those are the ones I see online on Facebook and witness in person day in and day out. We teach our children what we are by our actions. Not by what we say; though what we say can break spirits and hearts. Your words have power, especially with your children, so use them wisely. Respond to your children. Don't react to them. That can shut them off to you faster than snapping your finger. Proverbs 15:1 says a gentle answer turns away wrath but a harsh word stirs up anger. This is true for all ages. I don't know about you, but I like my house peaceful and not full of stress and strife.

It is always, always, always better to HAVE character than to BE a character. Proverbs 22:1 states that it is better to have a good name than to be rich and to have respect is better than having gold and silver. There are people that you know that when you think of them, of their behavior, even of their name you don't think very favorably of them, if the truth were to be told - even though you might consider them a "friend".

What happened to the good old days of teaching your children the values of respecting yourself and others - because if they truly respected themselves they wouldn't wear a lot of what they do (just sayin'), hard work, integrity, modesty, kindness to others, everything in moderation, honor and so on? When did those fall by the wayside and become "old fashioned" values? Those values NEVER go out of style!

You are their PARENT FIRST and their friend second. If they don't like that you discipline them now, they'll get over it later because they'll remember the lessons learned from it. I did. I hated it at the time, but I learned from it. Children NEED rules and boundaries. Why? Because it shows them that you care! If you let them get away with anything and everything, they will get into bigger troubles to try and get your attention to show them that you actually care for them. Go figure! Sounds crazy but studies have shown it to be true! Correct and appropriate discipline is a GOOD thing! But never discipline in anger. Again, that is the reactionary side of things. Respond. Don't react.

Another thing, don't talk down to them! The world is treating and talking to our children like they have PhD's and we still talk to them like they're in pre-school. Would you rather they find out about things like sex and STDs and drugs and drinking from their friends first or from you first? Young children don't need the details, just the basics satisfy them. As they get older you can answer with more. But if you are too embarrassed to talk to them about those things and the consequences, you can bet that their friends won't be and they won't be talking about the consequences. Be wise. Be a parent. Give them a reason to be able to trust coming to you with these questions. DON'T REACT! Respond.

Yes, I know I have been saying that a lot here, but it is TRUE! Responding gives them a safe atmosphere where they are comfortable talking to you. Reacting shuts them down and makes them think, "I can never come to her/him with anything because, WHOA!" And they check out.

Be the parent you want your children to be. They do what you DO, not what you say, no matter how many times we wish it were otherwise. But, if you are the person you need to be, then you won't have to wish it were the other way around.

Be ATTENTIVE to your children! Don't check out. The phone, the computer, your work, your friends...NONE of them are more important than your child. Spend time with them. Let them know that they matter to you. Children spell L-O-V-E as T-I-M-E. Don't be afraid to get silly with them. They love it and they'll love you all the more for it. It's hot, you're sweaty, it's raining, you're hair is frizzing? Suck. It. Up. They're only young once and time flies so don't blink or you'll soon had a tween or teen who doesn't want to spend time with you and you'll have lost out. Again, spend TIME with them, or you will find as they grow they don't have time for you.

It makes my heart hurt to hear and see what kids are doing and behaving like these days and I thank God every day that Emily and Nate are far different from most of what I see out there today. It's times like this that I really do miss Mayberry. I miss the values so clearly portrayed in that show. I wish that they were still the focal values in society today. I think we would be a whole lot better off if they were.

Pure Is Not Just For Ivory Soap

TRUTHBOMB

This is what I'm teaching my 11 year old daughter. For most of my adult life I have willfully disobeyed God when it came to sex and I admit it. In the movie, "The Devil's Advocate", the devil, played by a couple of actors - Al Pachino most notably, at the very end of the movie looks right into the camera and says, "Vanity, definitely my favorite sin." Well, for me it's always been lust that I've struggled with almost all my life.

In the movie "Oklahoma" there's the song, "I Can't Say No" with the line in it that goes, "...kissin's my favorite food...with or without the mistletoe, I'm in the holiday mood". Yup. Kissing and everything else that follows. But here's the thing. Yes, lust has historically been my favorite sin, so to speak. Somewhere along the way, I started to believe that in order to get a man's attention or keep it, that I had to offer up my body. Cheapen the act of intimacy and turn it into something crude and rude and vulgar. Sometimes it was so that I wouldn't feel lonely. Sometimes it was to prove to myself that I was desirable to others because I had extremely low self-esteem, regardless of my looks. Sometimes it was just because I wanted to feel close to someone. Sometimes it was just because I wanted to.

Maybe it had to do with the childhood trauma of being molested, not raped, thank God, but by more than one person as a child. One, a single adult in the neighborhood who'd been friendly to all the kids. I suspect I wasn't the only one, but I could never prove it. Two others, one girl when I was very young who was much older than me, one boy my age when I was older... All of these years apart from each other, but all under the age of 10 for me. My mom only knew of the one at the time, and only because my best friend back then forced me to tell her. Back in the late 70's through mid-80's, you just didn't discuss stuff like this and I didn't know what to say or do about it. The one was dealt with quietly and she protected me as best as she knew how and I love her even more for it. But you don't experience stuff like that and not have it leave some sort of damage to your soul.

Regardless of the reason, I KNEW it was wrong. As I got into my late teens, I finally caved to the pressures of the world that said, "if it feels good...DO IT" and continued to do so for many years. Growing up in a strong Christian household and having accepted Christ at an early age, I was definitely not ignorant of God's Word and what it said about intimacy and sex outside of marriage. I was just willfully disobedient about it. Like so many Christians I know today. People who claim to know and love and follow Jesus, but think that living with someone or having sex before marriage is perfectly fine because purity is old fashioned and...everybody's doing it.

I'm woefully guilty of this myself. I KNEW it was wrong but did it anyway. I desensitized myself to God and what His guidance is.

There are reasons why God says that we are to save ourselves for the person we marry. GOOD reasons. There's so much heartache to be brought into a marriage if you've contracted an STD or have "tried somebody else on for size". Too many people to compare your spouse with and what if they fall short of your prior experiences? What disappointments are you bringing to them? To yourself?

There's a REASON God says we are to remain pure and chaste for the one He has chosen for us.

Casual sex is rampant in many societies. There is, in truth, no such thing as “casual” sex, because of the depth of intimacy involved in the sexual relationship. The following analogy helps you to understand just what casual sex and multiple partners does to us. If we take a sticky note and attach it to a piece of paper, it will adhere. If we remove it, it will leave behind a small amount of residue; the longer it remains, the more residue is left. If we take that note and stick it to several places repeatedly, it will leave residue everywhere we stick it, and it will eventually lose its ability to adhere to anything. This is much like what happens to us when we engage in “casual” sex. Each time we leave a sexual relationship, we leave a part of ourselves behind. The longer the relationship has gone on, the more we leave behind, and the more we lose of ourselves. As we go from partner to partner, we continue to lose a tiny bit of ourselves each time, and eventually we may lose our ability to form a lasting sexual relationship at all.

Yes, I have a rather colorful past. God, in His grace and mercy, has forgiven me for the sins of my past. It has been 2 years since my divorce and I have not been intimate with anyone since then. Not even when I was seriously dating someone a year ago. I know now WHY God says these things. I am so thankful that God did not allow me to reap the punishments I deserved for my sins. I don't have to explain to someone that I contracted something that can't be gotten rid of because I gave myself away to someone who was just as reckless with their bodies as I had been with mine. But I have friends...family in Christ, who have had to deal with the fallout from their sin of lust and sex before marriage and it's hard. It is difficult for them. It's a whole different world to have to deal with. A permanent reminder. Even if it is an STD that has gone away through surgery or medication, the fact is that they still had one. It is just one result of not honoring our bodies and the gift that God has given us to give ONLY to our spouse that He has chosen for us. Of not respecting ourselves...or God.

Do you not think that God doesn't love you and that He wouldn't have chosen the best person for you? Perfect for you? Why ruin something wonderful by being unwilling to wait for God's best?

If this the lifestyles in this world are what's considered "normal", I'm glad to no longer be "normal". I'd much rather be considered "different" as I finally follow what God says about sex. Yeah, it might be "old fashioned", but so what? At least I know that the one who is worthy of the person I've become loves me for me, and not because I'm an "easy" catch. Someone who's an "easy" catch is just as easily thrown back while they search for someone who is worth keeping...someone who isn't so easy to catch.

So, here are some other truths for you if you're single, whether you've never been married or are married and divorced - once or more than once, like myself.

1. God desires us to be pure, maybe the reason you are single is that He is removing that temptation from your life until you are ready for the one He has chosen for you.

2. God is still writing your love story so don't mess up the ending by trying to write your own.

3. God wants your focus to be Him first. Keep your eyes on HIM and delight yourself in Him and He has promised to give you the desires of your heart.

4. You should be so hidden in God that someone needs to seek Him in order to find you, and when they do find you both of you should keep seeking Him together because, as the Bible says "a cord of 3 strands is not easily broken".

5. Trust in God means trust in HIS timing. We can't force God to move and if we try to do it on our own, how can He bless us with His best?

6. The RIGHT one will respect you and your decision to remain pure and will want to honor what it is that God has given to the two of you by not pressuring you to have premarital sex.

7. Ladies...yes, it is a man's job to respect you...but it is your job, as a woman, to give him something to respect.

People are watching...

A man was being tailgated by a stressed out woman on a busy street. Suddenly, the light turned yellow just in front of him. He did the right thing, stopping at the crosswalk. The tailgating woman hit the roof, and the horn, screaming as she missed her chance to get through the intersection.

As she was still in mid-rant, she heard a tap on her window and looked up into the face of a police officer. He took her to the police station where she placed in a holding cell.

After a couple of hours, the policeman opened the cell door and said, "I'm very sorry for this mistake. You see, I pulled up behind your car while you were blowing your horn, flipping off the guy in front of you, and cussing a blue streak at him. I noticed the 'What Would Jesus Do?' bumper sticker, the 'Follow Me to Sunday School' bumper sticker, and the chrome-plated Christian fish emblem on the trunk. Naturally, I assumed you had stolen the car!"

As Believers, we are always being watched. Remember that. We are often the only Bible that people will read, and as they say, actions speak louder than words.

Who are you calling donkey?

There was once a donkey for hire.  He was chosen out of the rest of the donkeys to be the one hired out for a day.  At the end of the day, the rest of the donkeys asked him how his day went.

The donkey was thrilled.  "It was amazing," he said.  "There were crowds lining both sides of the street.  They were throwing palm fronds before my feet and shouting 'Hosanna!' as I passed by."

"You know," said the donkey, "I think they're gonna crown me King."

The point is obvious. Nobody remembers the donkey.  It is the Message he carries that people pay attention to - the donkey is only part of the background. Your life should be about presenting the message that the Lord is preparing to return, not about the donkey carrying that message. The donkey only carried the Message, and so should we all.

Strive to be the carrier of the message and show by example in our lives how that Message has transformed us, instead of braying like a donkey to bring attention to ourselves. The message we carry is far more important! It's eternal...

Rather be Single

Being out of a relationship for right at a year now, there are definite things I miss about being in a relationship. But sometimes love, no matter how strong, is just not enough. Sometimes the differences are just too great and people don’t want to compromise or bend or grow or you find out that you didn't have as much in common as you originally thought.

So you let go, you move on, and you work on becoming the right person for the RIGHT person because a successful relationship does not depend solely on *finding* the right person, but on *being* the right person. Working on oneself to become the right person is not easy...kind of hard at times, in fact, but you have to take an honest look at yourself and realize the one common denominator in your failed relationships is...you. Yes, most of the time it takes two to make or break a relationship, but, fact of the matter is that something wasn’t right on either side.

What made me choose...unwisely...each time? Why didn't any of the relationships last? Digging deep and being brutally honest, I’ve come to understand where I went wrong in my choices and why and now it’s about changing myself to make sure that

1. I don’t make those choice mistakes again and
2. that I am no longer that person. Besides, I know that when all is said and done, I won't be single forever.

After all, the BEST is waiting for me to be ready to handle everything I've been praying for. But, being single, for someone who truly enjoys being part of a couple, is not exactly my cup of tea - and single parent dating is rough! However, I know this much, from what I have learned in my experiences, I have come to realize that at the end of the day I would much rather be single right now than be with the wrong person. For myself and for my children.

What does it matter where they sleep?

You know, I’ve had a lot of people say over the past couple of years, “why don’t you make your kids sleep in their own beds instead of with you?” Well, as cramped as our small house is, not everyone has a bed of their own right now (Emily does, Nate doesn’t). But this past week it really hit home that having them share my king size bed by choice is a blessing.

Emily is at that age where she could be a snotty tween, anxious to be free from acknowledging her mom. Instead, she freely holds my hand in public and comes up to me to get big hugs from me and the past couple of nights, she hasn’t been able to get to sleep without asking to snuggle with me (which is a lot easier when Nate is not between us – LOL!) She is at a point where she needs reassurance from her mommy and love and acceptance. She is so wise beyond her years in many ways, but still is a sensitive, emotional child at heart. I know that all too soon those days will go by the wayside, most likely, so I cherish each request for a snuggle, each body ache from having her or Nate wrapped around me/draped over me as they sleep. It’s one part of this mommy’s way of giving them that unconditional love that every child needs.

Preemie babies thrive with touch and holding. It’s been scientifically documented that touch relieves pain and stress and preemies who receive frequent touch grow faster and have less health/medical issues. Touch is fundamental to brain growth and function in babies, so why wouldn’t it have the same stress/pain relieving effects on older children and adults? You know it does. How many times has the hug of a loved one helped you to feel better when your heart is hurting or your soul unsettled? With me, it’s like something falls into place. It is a balm to the pain, a calm to the unrest. At least that’s what I’ve found.

With Em last week and this week, she has struggled with the time change and has trouble finding sleep...until she asks me to snuggle with her. She’s out in less than 10 minutes. It is calming and soothing to be held, and I know that for my brainy, quirky, unique, brilliant babygirl, it helps to center her, feeds her need for unconditional acceptance and quiets her often chaotic thoughts. And for my whirling dervish that is Nate, it calms his effusive exuberance when it’s time to sleep and soothes his raging tempers; it takes away his pain. So confident is his belief that mommy’s kiss can cure anything, when he had that raging ear infection with blisters on his eardrum, his first thought was to try and get me to “tiss” it and make it stop hurting. Before any Band-Aid or ice-cube, it’s mommy’s hug and kiss he wants first to take the worst of the pain away.

So be free with your hugs, especially to your children. Even if they say they don’t want one, do it anyway. That one, simple touch, might just help cross a bridge you didn’t know was there. It lets them know that you care. And during their growing up years, that shapes so much of how they view the world. Make it a positive one.

YOLO is incorrect

I think this is another reason why I absolutely HATE the term YOLO with a passion b/c we DON'T only live once.

In the parable of Lazarus and the rich man (Luke 16:19-31)...have you noticed that the rich man has no name? That's b/c where he ended up...there was no need for a name b/c he will be forever aware of everything that goes on but forever separated from everything and everyone for eternity. Where he's at...he will never be known by anyone ever again. He has his memories, he has his awareness of his surroundings, he knows the hopelessness of the situation and the only thing he wants more than a drink of water is to save his five brothers. But HE HAS NO NAME! Why is that so important?

Because he doesn't need one.

Nobody will ever speak it again. There is no reprieve, no visitors, no hope and no need for a name. To all intents and purposes, he is dead, although eternally aware of it. Eternal, conscious, perpetual, lonely torment, dead forever, yet alive, remembering that one time when he could have escaped the torment. W.O.W.
That is what awaits the mailman, or the guy next to you, or your friends or relatives of whom we say, "I'll talk to him when the time is right" or when he says, "I'll think about it. Maybe tomorrow."
Then God says, "Thou fool, this night thy soul shall be required of thee." (Luke 12:20)

I know many people who don't believe in heaven, hell, an afterlife or eternity. Just b/c you don't believe doesn't mean it's not true. I would rather believe in God and find out that He doesn't exist than not believe in Him and find out that that He does...

You can fool some people...

For man looks at the outward appearance but the Lord looks at the heart...

It's so easy to fool others when all they can see is the surface, but God sees and knows our innermost thoughts, desires, intentions, plans...you name it. He knows when we plan to cheat someone financially...or cheat ON someone, lie about something, drink too much and get behind the wheel, put a TV show or your nights out or even your next fix, above the welfare and safety of your child(ren) and your duty to them as their parent to not check out and to be present.

You can have a beautiful facade of the perfect life, being the perfect person/parent/spouse, etc.

But it's what goes on behind and within the four walls of your life that God sees.

Those hurts, disappointments, struggles, past/current/(and/or) self abuse you try to hide from others, cheats, lies, crimes you don't think anyone else knows about...that keep you awake at night...that make you fearful that anyone should ever find out about...yeah...those things.

God sees them all. He knows them. He knows the REAL you. You can't hide from Him and you can't hide them from Him.

So if you think nobody knows who you really are...the one you are trying so hard to hide from everyone else...you're wrong. God knows. God sees. God hears and listens. That should scare some of you and comfort others. God loves you just as you are...but He loves you far too much to keep you that way.

Procrastination is the very devil...literally

Guilty as charged here. In fact I recognize this in me just recently, to my shame. The devil will always whisper in your ear "not now, you still have time..." Especially after a powerful sermon where the Holy Spirit has touched you to walk towards the altar. Or when you're trying to make serious decisions like live healthier, get serious about God or quit an addiction. Whatever your decision is, always shut down that negative voice that tells you "not now, you still have time.." Do it NOW! B/C the devil realizes that if he can get you to stall long enough that there will end up NOT being a later to do it in. Procrastination is not of God. Sadly, it is my biggest struggle. But God is helping me with that and to stop giving the devil a foothold in that area of my life.

You lost your faith? Where did you put it?

Faith...One loses one's faith when one forgets where he put it.

Many claim Christ, but misplace their faith in a religious system, or a particular preacher, or even a particular translation of the Bible. People tend to put the faith in a man of God, and not in the God of man, and when something tragic happens, or that misplaced faith is trampled on because the PERSON that faith was placed in was found to be fallible and a mere human who falls into sin just like everyone else, then faith can be damaged and even bring the believer to the point of loss of faith. That is why we cannot misplace our faith in humans or a thing created by mere, mortal man.

My faith is NOT in a particular version of the Bible, but in its Author, and that is why, when the going gets tough, when things seem to be weighing on me, when the stresses of the day and of life start to beat and batter me down, I remember that God is always faithful to me, has proven Himself in that faithfulness over and over and over again, and I know that He is always with me, always watching out for me and my children, always there to provide, to teach, to guide, to show me how greatly He loves me.

You can have FAITH or you can have fear. The choice is yours. It's what you allow to take the foremost thought in your mind. Faith or fear...which will it be? Faith is of the Lord and fear is of the enemy and the enemy is a liar. God has not created us for or given us a spirit of fear and timidity, but He has given us a spirit of boldness and power and love. To paraphrase parts of Deuteronomy 31:6-8,

“Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the Lord your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you....Be strong and courageous...The Lord himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged.”

Be strong.
Be courageous.
Do not be afraid.
God is with you.
He will never leave or forsake you.

Hello? Is this getting through to anyone? Place your faith in the hands of the One who will never let you down and who is not the creator of fear, but instead is the One in whose presence fear flees.

Faith or fear? The choice is yours.

Rock Bottom

Have you ever had God rock you to your core and strip you of everything you thought was good and start to rebuild your foundation more solidly? Absolute BEST thing ever!!!

Hard? Oh, yes. I won't lie. Hard and often painful. 

Worth it? Absolutely!!!

But we won't be able to stand firm without a solid foundation and once you hit rock bottom the only way to go is up. So if that's where you find yourself, start building from the bottom up!! When life knocks you to your knees, you're in the perfect position to start praying...

Trust...so easy to say...so hard to do

Have you ever just had "one of those times" where it seems that everything you want is within reach and then it starts to crumble? I've been going through a REALLY tough time since early, early Wednesday morning. It's personal. It's taking a toll on me. It really sucks. It's nothing life threatening, just emotionally painful. It's a struggle to make it through the days with such limited sleep. About 5 ½ hours since I finally got in bed around 6 a.m. yesterday morning. I feel like a zombie. And it's especially difficult to be dealing with this on my own, so to speak, with no buffer between myself and the kids. My mom is out of town for a few days so I am putting up a brave front for them but it gets tiring. But, as always, I have to be the strong one.

But God has my back. He's told me so in no uncertain terms. I'm a firm believer that if God says something twice, He's really trying to tell me something – just as my pastor says – if God says something in the Bible more than once, He's trying to get our attention on that subject.

And I agree 100% on that...HOWEVER...if God tells me something SEVEN times...I'd better be listening, understanding and obeying.

All of the below posts are from around 7 or 8 last night through around 11 this morning. All of them from friends who know nothing about what is going on in my life. But POOF, there they were at different times. SCREAMING at me to LOOK and PAY ATTENTION.

As I said...SEVEN posts on the same theme...I'm being given a "God Smack" right upside my head.

3/28 FB Post: Picture: "My child, you worry too much, I've got this, remember? Love, God"

3/28 FB Post: So do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will take care of itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own. Matthew 6:34

3/28 FB Post: "Doubt less, more Faith "

3/29 FB Post:
Don’t Be Troubled
TODAY’S VERSE
“Therefore, my dear brothers, stand firm. Let nothing move you.”
I Corinthians 15:58
“Do not let your hearts be troubled. Trust in God; trust also in me. ”
John 14:1
TODAY’S THOUGHT
In life we will have trials. We will have struggles. To grow is to stretch ourselves. With this come risks. So we step out in faith; and even then, we can have times of fear, doubt and anxiety. Many times we avoid conflict, hide from our struggles or simply try to escape pain through various ways. We can try and ignore our pressures but sooner or later avoidance won’t work anymore. We have to face the situation we find ourselves in. The good news is that God is faithful. He knows our struggles, He knows our limitations. Paul the Apostle encourages us, because of the love and power of God, to stand firm and let nothing move us. Jesus encourages us not to let our hearts be troubled by believing in God who is almighty and all loving. God is for us. He loves us. He is our strength. So today, stand firm, put all your trust in God. Exercise your faith and give all your struggles, trials and temptations to Him.
TODAY’S PRAYER
Father, You know all about my situation. You know my worries, fears and anxious thoughts. Help me stand firm. Help my heart not to be troubled. I do believe in You, dear God. I come now and trust You with all my life.
AMEN
TODAY’S MEDITATION & AFFIRMATION
I will trust in God
Feel yourself being weighed down by trials and tribulation. You burden is so heavy. You are at the end of your rope when you remember to call out to Jesus. You cry out to Him and decide to stand firm letting nothing move you from your resolve to trust God. You feel you burden become lighter. You sense that God is giving you strength to live for Him. You affirm, “I will trust in God!”

3/29 Tweet: "And once again I say... NO MAN can open a door God has already SHUT nor can they SHUT a door that God has already OPENED #DEPENDENTonHIM"

3/29 Retweet: "If anyone has had a rough day: 1 Peter 5:7 - Cast all your anxiety on Him because He cares for you ". (This actually goes with what a dear friend told me yesterday that God was telling her to tell me to read, which was all of 1 and 2 Peter. This retweet is by someone who also doesn't know my other friend who told me that. How's that for a READ THIS NOW!?)

3/29 Tweet: Tough times? The reason why GOD gave the assignment to you and not to someone else, maybe because HE TRUSTS YOU with the task!

All of these random, posts, all with a central theme all for me. DON'T WORRY...so easy to say...so hard to do, but I'm trying. It's hard but I'm really trying. I'm a worrier by nature. I constantly feel like I HAVE to be in control of my life b/c it's so hard to give over that control to anyone else. On this earthly realm I've never really been able to depend on anyone but my mom and myself and my best friend, MC. Everyone else has let me down in some form or fashion.

God has proven time and again that He is nothing but FAITHFUL to the very end...but my human nature and propensity for worrying is so strong that God really does have to "hit me upside the head" a la "Gibbs" style with these messages. (Those of you who watch NCIS, will get the reference there)

So, God, I'm trying to give that control over to You. It's painful for me to do, so please be patient, as You have already been. But please know that I'm trying. I'm listening and I'm trying.

I love You... ♥♥

10 truths about happy marriages

The title of this article caught my attention and, while the boyfriend and I are not at this stage...yet, I think it is good advice not just for marriages, but romantic relationships in general. It's 10 simple and practical steps on how to keep a happy marriage (relationship).

10 truths about happy marriages
By Laurie Puhn

People in happy marriages don’t fight, satisfied lovers never complain, and romantic love is constant and everlasting. Are you cracking a smile yet?

Even the best of us who start off in marriage with knee-knocking love and tingles up the spine, will eventually discover that love has ups and downs. -- Picking up dirty socks isn’t what you’d like to be doing, but it’s what you do anyway, for the sake of marriage.

Happy couples are happy because they handle mundane issues and conflict with verbal tact and warmth so they are still holding hands when serious obstacles come their way.

If you want to have a superior relationship with your partner and be a good role model for your children, then enhance your verbal skills today by adopting the tips below.

What I have found as a couples mediator is that the same verbal skills work to improve every relationship.

These 10 quick and simple tips from my book "Fight Less, Love More" will keep the peace in the family and make your love connection stronger.

1. Happy Couples Pick Their Battles
Before you get angry and reprimand your mate for making a mistake or doing something you told him or her not to do, stop and ask yourself this one wise question: "Does this affect me?" If it doesn't, button your lips and avoid a fight. After all, your mate is the one who must deal with the consequence, not you.

2. Happy Couples Play Detective
When your mate's mistake does affect you, what then? Rather than being hostile, find out what really happened. Ask neutral and respectful questions such as, "Can you tell me what happened?" or "I don't understand. Am I missing something here?" You might discover a good reason for the oversight or blunder, which could avoid a blow-up.

3. Happy Couples Complain with Impact
When you have a complaint, say what you do want, not what you don't want. For example, rather than saying to your child or mate, "Get off that darn computer -- you're so rude!" instead target your mate using a positive approach: "I miss your company. Can you join me in the living room to hang out?"

4. Happy Couples Skip the "Whatever" Word
Being passive by often saying "whatever you want" might temporarily avoid a fight, but it could breed resentment because it leaves the majority of decisions to your mate, which can be stressful. Instead, have a real opinion and share it.

5. Happy Couples Create Policies
If your mate does something that affects and disturbs you, such as overspending or making plans for both of you without asking the other first, don't get sucked into the heated "How could you?" argument.

Instead, focus on the future by creating policy solutions, as in, "From now on can we agree to make a budget for our personal expenses?" Or: "Can we agree to check in with each other before making plans for both of us?"

6. Happy Couples Show They Care
Forgetting to ask about what's going on in your child or your mate's daily life is a surefire way to erode a relationship. From now on, if you know that someone in your family has an important meeting, test, doctor appointment, or event that day, don't neglect it -- instead, respect it. Call, e-mail, text, or ask in person, "How did it go?" This sends a clear message: I care about you.

7. Happy Couples Avoid Factual Arguments
Do you and your mate often find yourselves arguing about the name of a restaurant you went to, a certain address, someone's birthday, an historical fact, or sports figure? Then you are prone to having a dumb argument! Stop the conversation and do an online fact check, call a friend, or simply drive by the location.

8. Happy Couples Apologize with the “B” Word
Quickly saying the words "I'm sorry" is a bad apology because it often comes off as insincere, and could trigger another battle. Next time you seek mercy, add the "B" word: Say, "I'm sorry because..." and share how you hurt your mate and what you will do to prevent the wrongdoing from recurring. Research shows that when you add the "because clause" your words are more persuasive.

9. Happy Couples Create Border Control
Are you ever angry with your partner for revealing something to others that you consider private, like a health issue, a child discipline issue, job insecurity, or a marital disagreement? If so, bypass the "How could you say that?!" argument. Instead, establish border control: Outline the topics that should remain private to insure that neither of you becomes an accidental traitor.

10. Happy Couples Give a Daily Dose of Recognition
Most couples on the divorce path seldom compliment each other. In our online survey for "Fight Less, Love More," we asked people, "Would you rather your mate compliment you for being kind or good-looking?" The result was that 84 percent of people said "kind."

The lesson: Find daily opportunities to recognize your mate for something that reflects a character strength (you are such a wonderful mother/father, you are so thoughtful when you...).